Pet Cremations
The Final Farewell: How to Handle a Pet’s Remains
by Moira Anderson Allen, M.Ed
In other articles, I’ve talked about the most painful decision a pet owner ever has to face—the decision about whether, or when, to euthanize a pet. But the death of a pet brings with it yet another difficult decision, and one which you may not be prepared, at the moment of loss, to deal with. That is the decision of how to handle your pet’s remains.
Many pet owners never even think about this issue until their vet suddenly asks, “What do you want to do with the body?” Needless to say, this is not the best time to think calmly and rationally about all the options available and arrive at a well-thought-out decision. Unfortunately, this often leads to a hasty decision made at the height of painful emotion—and a decision that one may later regret.
The only alternative is to consider this decision ahead of time. Asking yourself what you want to do with your pet’s remains while that pet is still alive and healthy isn’t ghoulish. It’s a responsible way of facing, and dealing with, a painful reality. It also gives you an opportunity to evaluate all the factors that may be involved in such a decision.
The first factor to consider is your own feelings about death, loss, and remembrance. When you face the death of a pet, your goal will be to preserve the memory of that pet—and your decision should be based on how you think that memory can be best preserved.
Funerals: The Final Farewell
Many people feel that providing a dignified burial or cremation for a pet is a final, fitting act of farewell. They feel that it is the last act of love that they can offer a pet, and it is also, quite often, an important act of closure. Actually being able to view, touch, and say farewell to a pet’s body can help one accept that the pet is really dead, that it is not going to come back— and also that it is not suffering in any way. If it is important to you to see that your pet’s remains aretreated with the same concern and care that you gave your pet during its life, then you should look into home burial, pet cemetery burial, or cremation through a pet crematory. Here’s a closer look at these options:
1. Home Burial.
Many people choose to bury a pet at home as a way of keeping it close—a part of one’s world, even if it isn’t a part of one’s life. This can also provide a way for you and your family to celebrate a funeral and memorial service, which in themselves can be powerful coping tools. Some pet owners have also reported that their surviving pets seem to understand that their companion is still “present”, and report that those pets may spend time visiting the gravesite. Home burial provides the opportunity to create a permanent memorial to one’s pet—a grave marker, a statue, or perhaps a tree planted over the pet’s grave to serve as a living memorial. (Others choose to bury a pet under an existing shrub or tree that the pet liked to sleep under.)
In some circumstances, however, home burial may not be an appropriate option. The most obvious is if you have no place in which to bury a pet. You must also be sure that you can dig a deep enough grave to ensure that your pet’s remains will not be disturbed or become a health hazard. (Don’t bury a pet in a flowerbed that is likely to be re-dug and replanted.) Many Council’s prohibit home burials if your pet has been euthanized. You also might not wish to bury a pet at home if you rent, or if you are likely to move away from the property.
2. Cremation.
If you would still like to keep your pet’s remains on your property, but don’t have a place to bury an actual body (especially that of a large pet), consider having your pet’s remains cremated and returned to you for burial. This still has the advantage of keeping your pet “at home,” but bypasses health problems or the concern that the pet’s remains might be disturbed later. Or, you can keep the pet’s ashes in a decorative urn or container.
Many pet owners choose to scatter a pet’s ashes rather than preserve them. Some choose to scatter the ashes in the pet’s own yard, where it lived and played; this is another way of bringing the pet “home” one last time.
Others choose to scatter the ashes in a way that symbolizes setting the pet “free” for its final journey—such as in the woods or over a body of water, or just into the wind. Pet crematories can now be found in many cities; a pet crematory can usually pick up your pet’s remains from a veterinarian or from your home. Some veterinarians also provide cremation services; some will do so at an extra charge if they have euthanized your pet or if it dies at the vet’s office. (Not all veterinarians provide this service, so it might be advisable to check this in advance.)
3. Cemetery Burial.
You’ll find pet cemeteries in nearly every state. For many, a formal cemetery burial seems a more fitting tribute than an informal “backyard burial”. Burial in a pet cemetery also ensures that your pet’s remains will remain undisturbed, and cared for a period of time.” You will not have to worry about what will happen to your pet if you have to leave the property on which it is buried; it will be cared for, no matter where you go or what happens to you. Cemetery burial can be a costly option, but many find it a comforting, secure way to handle a pet’s remains.
